National Politics – Page 4 – The Takoma Torch

Republicans Force Schools to Adopt ‘Critical Erase Theory’

Sen. Tim Kaine Enjoys “Greatest Day Ever” Stuck in I-95 Snowstorm for 27 Hours

Congress Required to Practice Hiding Under Desks to Prepare for Threat of Gun Control Debate

Darth Vader ‘Scared For His Life,’ Acted in Self-Defense When Blowing Up Alderaan

Republicans Blame The Count For Biden Winning Election

Joe Manchin Says He’s Not Really A Democrat or Republican, Just a Huge Fucking Asshole

White House Announces President Biden Having a “Bones Day”

Entire Democratic Party Destroyed After Local Asshole Ignored 1,327th Campaign Email Asking for Only $5

Nation Shocked That State of Texas, Supreme Court Did Exactly What They’ve Been Promising for Decades

Taliban Denies Afghan Capital Insurrection Ever Happened

FDA Grants Full Approval For Anti-Vaxxers To Come Up With Another Convenient Excuse to Refuse COVID Vaccination

America’s Long Period of Not Worrying About Afghanistan Finally Comes to an End

All written material on this site is the intellectual property of the Takoma Torch, and is only intended for people with a sense of humor. If you would like to submit a funny headline, please email it to takomatorch@gmail.com. If you have any complaints, please email dcra@dc.gov