BETHESDA, MD – Falling far short of fan expectations, sources confirmed that the Facebook video of local third-grader Dylan Ottenheimer hitting a pitch in a youth baseball game was not actually that impressive to watch.
“While we respect the hard work and practice that it took to make contact in an actual game situation, Dylan’s ground ball unfortunately fails to outshine highlights of actual professional baseball players who hit homeruns well over 400 feet,” said a source who works in sports talent scouting. “The effort is there – Dylan is shown hustling to first base, which he reaches thanks to a basic fielding error – but, ultimately, the video just doesn’t live up to the standards of those looking to be inspired by better talent.”
Not only was the level of sports ability in the clip far below expectations, but the video quality was even worse. Dylan’s dad zoomed in solely on Dylan running after the hit was made, leaving viewers wondering where the hell the ball went and how Dylan could have possibly made it all the way to third base while running at an incredibly slow speed and after having fallen down twice.