ROCKVILLE, MD – Male members of the Montgomery County Council found themselves in hot water this week after blaming the lack of women on the council on the nation’s current supply chain crisis.
“We wore a pussy hats to the Women’s March in 2017, so believe me, we’re all for equality,” said one male Council member who refused to be named. “However, we can’t take responsibility for the extreme lack of equal representation on the Council when it’s simply because our shipment of women politicians is taking a lot longer than estimated. Maybe we should have paid extra for two day delivery.”
Eight of the nine current members of the Council are men, as is the County Executive. With Council member Nancy Navarro not seeking reelection and only men competing for the County Executive nomination, an all male county government next year is a distinct possibility. “We regret the inconvenience to Montgomery County voters,” said Board of Elections official Ken McMahon. “If, at some point, we determine that our shipment of women has been lost, we’ll cancel it and re-order. In the meantime, you’re just going to have to be patient.”
Many of the more than 500,000 women in the county rejected the notion that a lack of supply was the problem, pointing instead to men’s unwillingness to cede power or to invest in potential female candidates. Male politicians, however, bristled at the notion that they are insufficiently supportive. “I have consistently been in favor of women running for office,” said another male Council member while wearing a Notorious RBG shirt. “As long as they don’t run against me or any of my political friends and allies. Or my opponents, actually. But, in theory, I love the idea.”
When asked for comment on dealing with the shortage, a female candidate started to answer when McMahon cut her off and offered his own advice instead. “It will be hard this election cycle, but we encourage everyone to vote as early as possible just to be safe,” said McMahon. “The good news is that this is a short-term problem and we expect the issue to be resolved by next year, right after the election.”