Duolingo Now Offering Lessons In Government Acronyms for New DC Area Residents

WASHINGTON, DC – In an effort to help new DC area residents figure out what the hell federal employees are talking about all the time, Duolingo is now offering lessons in government acronyms.

“I used to hate going to happy hours with my wife’s coworkers because I didn’t understand anything they were saying,” said Rick Salazar of Silver Spring, MD. “Now, thanks to Duolingo, I don’t feel like a complete moron when someone says that they went from being a PMI to an SES at NOAA and now they’re on a long term TDY to an OCONUS location for an RDT&E project.”

Following the same approach that has taught wealthy homeowners to make small talk with their housekeepers and gardeners, Duolingo hopes that teaching people in the private sector to carry on conversations with government employees might help create a better understanding of and appreciation for the important role of government.

“After just a few lessons with Duolingo, I realized that government employees weren’t speaking in tongues or some secret robot code,” said Meghan Nichols of Great Falls, VA. “Don’t get me wrong, I still don’t trust the government, but I appreciate that by creating a means of communicating through abbreviations, they’ve finally figured out how to do something efficiently.”

In addition to good reviews from learners, government employees are also happy that the program is helping more people to understand them. “Even if they get it wrong sometimes, it’s always nice when people make an attempt to speak our language,” said Dana Ericson, a GS-15 level SAMHSA employee currently on FMLA leave. “Now if only Duolingo can teach all these stupid tourists to stand to the right of the fucking Metro escalators.”