White Flint Metro Station to be Renamed ‘White Bethesda’

Original Unaltered Image by Dan Reed

NORTH BETHESDA, MD – After careful consideration of requests from local residents and businesses, the Washington Metropolitan Area Transit Authority (WMATA) board unanimously approved a proposal to rename the metro station at White Flint to “White Bethesda.”

“Our goal was to respect the members of the local community by creating a name that we felt reflected its identity,” said community spokesperson Mackenzie Christianson. “With popular commercial developments like Pike and Rose, an REI, and plenty of great brunch spots, we think we nailed it.”

In addition to the name change of the former White Flint station, WMATA also decided to change the name of the entire western portion of Montgomery County’s Red Line to the “Bethesda Line,” with all associated stations to be renamed as follows:

1. Bethesda Heights
2. Bethesda
3. Medical Bethesda
4. Artsy Bethesda
5. White Bethesda
6. Gemini Bethesda
7. Bethesdaville
8. Shady Bethesda

Montgomery County politicians celebrated the name changes. “No longer will we have to constantly remind DC commuters which end of the Red Line to head towards when they want to go shopping for custom kitchen cabinets and appliances,” said County Executive Marc Elrich. “Also, by calling it the ‘Bethesda Line,’ our Upcounty residents might feel more comfortable using public transportation.”