
The Awkward Teens are finally over and we’re now entering our Twenties where we can finally do whatever we want – what could possibly go wrong? It’s time to throw out all of the crap from the past decade and enter the new one with a renewed fighting spirit.
So beware, fans. It’s going to get a lot more interesting.
| OUT | IN |
| Netflix and Chill | Disney Plus and Divorce |
| Getting Rid of Parking Lots | Getting Rid of Barking Dogs |
| Kombucha Tea | Cave Wine |
| #Woke | #Bespoke |
| 5G Cell Towers | Tin Cans and a String |
| “Fireworks!” | “Gunshots!” |
| Donald Trump’s Comb-over | Jaime Raskin’s Perm |
| Attacking Trump | Attacking Democratic Front Runners |
| “OK, Boomer” | “I’m not in Grandma’s will?!” |
| Couples Counseling | Throuples Counseling |
| Booing Bryce Harper | Booing Kurt Suzuki |
| Avocado Toast | Deconstructed Nachos |
| Marvelous Mrs. Maisel | Marvelous Madame President |
| Boycotting the NFL | Boycotting NDC |
| Class Warfare | Generation Gap |
| Individual Streaming Service | Bundled Cable |
| Russian Bots | Listserv Trolls |
| Baby Trump | Baby Yoda |
| Nuclear-Free Zones | Gluten-Free Scones |
| Roscoe the Rooster | Popeye’s Fried Chicken Sandwich |
| “Hey, Alexa…” | “As you wish, Amazon Overlord.” |
| Vaccinations | Measles |
| Paying for Things | Having Other People Pay for Things |
| White Lady Yelling at Cat Meme | White Lady Yelling at Council Member |
| Fake Meat | Alternative Cows |
| Peloton Wife | Getting Hit in Crosswalk |
| City Wards | Listserv Territories |
| Co-Work Spaces | Hogging Coffee Shop Tables |
| “All Are Welcome Here” | “Stay Out of My School District” |
| End of Plastic Straws | Never Ending Straw Man Arguments |
| Impeach | Data Breach |
| WAU Hospital | Wellness Dispensaries |
| Joe Biden 2019 | Joe Biden 2009 |
| Snow Days | Sea Level Rise Days |
| War on Christmas | Attack on Nights 3 through 5 of Hanukkah |
| Pussy Hats | Tinfoil Helmets |
| Protesting with Greta Thunberg | Protecting Ruth Bader Ginsburg |
| Scientific Consensus | Internet Opinions |
| Crossing Guards | Construction Zone Sherpas |
| Her Emails | His Pee Tape |
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