Karen Calls Cops on Painting of Black Woman For Loitering
TAKOMA PARK, MD - Fearing for her life while clutching her pearls, a white woman most likely named Karen called the cops on a painting of a black woman on...
City Arborist: Each Christmas Tree Purchase Requires Decoration of 6 Additional Trees
Photo Credit - Alle Sebrina TAKOMA PARK, MD - As residents plan a visit to the volunteer fire department's annual Christmas tree lot, they should be aware of a new...
Trump Funds Entire Takoma Park Library Expansion in Exchange For Designation as His Presidential Library
Image provided by RRMM Architects, a firm clearly not as qualified as local non-expert design enthusiasts. TAKOMA PARK, MD - Utilizing tips and tricks from his own best selling book,...
Target Unveils New Line of Fire Resistant Gender Reveal Party Supplies
After a second major wildfire was ignited in California by a gender reveal party gone wrong, Target announced a new line of fire resistant party supplies intended to allow parents...
Disney Plus Increases Monthly Fee to $3,000 in Anticipation of the Release of ‘Hamilton’
Fans waiting in anticipation of the release of 'Hamilton' on Disney Plus were crushed as the streaming network announced it is jacking up its monthly subscription fee to $3,000 and...
Juneteenth Becomes Holiday for White People to Announce When They First Learned About Juneteenth
As nationwide Black Lives Matter protests are helping to reshape views on American history, Juneteenth has become a new holiday for white people to announce when they first learned about...
‘Party of Lincoln’ Decries Toppling of Confederate Statue
Photo Credit: Alexa Welch Edlund/Richmond Times-Dispatch RICHMOND, VA - Conservatives across Virginia decried the recent toppling of a statue of confederate general Williams Carter Wickham, saying the statue was peacefully...
Takoma Park Unveils Campaign to Take Progressive Title from Berkeley, California
After years of bearing the unofficial moniker “Berkeley of the East”, the city of Takoma Park this week launched a strategic campaign to improve its national brand and seize the...
People Believing They Can Sing Likely a Symptom of Coronavirus, CDC Warns
While scrolling through your Facebook feed, it's likely you've seen videos of your friends shamelessly singing cover songs for all to hear. You’ve probably worried about these friends' states of...
Jesus Emerges From Tomb, Sees Shadow, Announces Six More Weeks of Quarantine
JERUSALEM - Jesus, Son of God and savior to more than two billion Christians, emerged from his tomb Easter morning, saw his shadow, declared six more weeks of quarantine and then...
‘Rooster King’ Documentary to Air on Takoma Park City TV
Joe Organic holds one of his 1,200 "pets" Fans of Netflix's new binge-worthy documentary "Tiger King" will be excited to hear about the upcoming release of "Rooster King,” a seven-part...
Woman Returning From Overseas Vacation Becomes Local Ethnic Restaurant Critic
Photo Credit - Mike Mayer TAKOMA PARK, MD - Returning from a week-long vacation in Cancun, Mexico to celebrate her friend's 30th birthday, Margaret Cross was excited to be eating...