White People Exhausted After Five Straight Days of Opposing Racism

TAKOMA PARK, MD – After almost a whole week of opposing racism by sharing inspirational quotes from historic black leaders on Facebook, white people can’t wait until things return to “normal” again.

“This has been the hardest week for me,” said McKenzie Christiansen. “But tonight, I’m going to make myself several Cosmopolitans and just try to stay positive about all of this. It’s all we can really do to ease tension in our lives.”

National news has been unusually stressful for white people this week, as police violence has once again claimed the life of an unarmed black person and then been turned against those protesting the murder. Extensive coverage of these events has forced white people to see the real life consequences of institutional racism, though, luckily, from a safe distance. While some of these white people have worked to recognize their privilege and use their advantages to protect the rights of others, most feel they are at a breaking point.

“I just don’t know what I’m going to do if this continues much longer,” said Roger Smith. “I’m one day away from publicly declaring that I’m taking a break from social media until it returns to a positive experience, like funny pictures of cats and bad quarantine hair cuts.”

Smith says his stress comes from an understanding that systemic racism affects everyone, including the white people who want to be supportive of oppressed racial and ethnic minorities at constant risk of being murdered by agents of the state, but who also don’t want to appear as if they don’t respect local law enforcement. “It’s a balancing act between being both woke, and fully supportive of the people I call everytime I think I see a suspicious person in my neighborhood,” said Smith.

It remains to be seen how much longer white people can handle more breaking news covering stories of racial injustice. It appears this weekend could be showing signs of a turning point, as a huge wave of temporary Black Lives Matter profile pictures on Facebook are expiring and reverting back to their 1990’s high school graduation photos.