Sarah Palin Sues NY Times For Not Giving Her Enough Chances to Solve Wordle

NEW YORK, NY – Former Vice Presidential Candidate Sarah Palin has filed another lawsuit against the New York Times, this time alleging the publication unfairly targeted her by not giving her more than six chances to solve Wordle.

“After a long morning of shooting bears and taking my kids to and from hockey practice, I can’t wait to spend a peaceful four-and-a-half hours solving the day’s Wordle,” said Palin. “But that precious time is now ruined knowing the game has always been rigged against me.”

Palin filed the lawsuit yesterday shortly after a jury rejected her unrelated libel claim against the Times. The new lawsuit claims the Times owes her more daily attempts after purposely and maliciously choosing “gotcha-type” words that Palin has never heard of, including honor, truth, and brain. She also complained that the Times does not provide her with the puzzle’s solution placed upside down at the bottom of the page like they do in Highlights Magazine.

“Don’t you think its a little weird that I’ve never been able to solve a single Wordle puzzle, even though everyone else on Facebook seems to do it so easily?” asked Palin. “And then I read from all of my sources that the lame-stream liberal media New York Times bought the game, and it suddenly made sense. They must be sending me a harder puzzle than everyone else is doing.”

When it was suggested that maybe her game strategy just needs an adjustment, Palin became defensive. “I’m a maverick, okay? And that means I don’t do what everyone else does. I start every day with the word “GOING”, followed by “ROGUE,” and if “DRILL” isn’t the answer after 3 separate tries, then clearly Wordle is using stranger words than the names I gave my kids.”