{"id":3044,"date":"2024-10-08T12:11:12","date_gmt":"2024-10-08T16:11:12","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/takomatorch.com\/?p=3044"},"modified":"2024-10-08T12:30:37","modified_gmt":"2024-10-08T16:30:37","slug":"world-leaders-monitoring-deteriorating-situation-in-takoma-parks-pen-listserv","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/takomatorch.com\/index.php\/2024\/10\/08\/world-leaders-monitoring-deteriorating-situation-in-takoma-parks-pen-listserv\/","title":{"rendered":"World Leaders Monitoring Deteriorating Situation in Takoma Park\u2019s PEN Listserv"},"content":{"rendered":"\n
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TAKOMA PARK, MD \u2014 In what some experts are calling \u201cthe most trivial yet heated political dispute of the decade,\u201d Ward 1\u2019s beloved PEN listserv has erupted into a digital battleground over a local city council election, drawing the attention of leaders around the globe. What began as a minor race of a few thousand voters has escalated into an all-out war, with residents furiously typing away to defend their preferred candidate and denounce perceived interference from the mayor.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Local officials have described the PEN listserv as \u201cabsolute chaos,\u201d with community members saying they\u2019ve never seen anything like it. \u201cI\u2019ve been on PEN for twenty years, and I\u2019ve never seen tempers this high,\u201d said local resident and self-described \u201coccasional lurker\u201d Betty Bickerson. \u201cPeople are attacking the mayor, attacking each other, and accusing anyone who disagrees with them of single-handedly destroying democracy. I’m now keeping my cat inside.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The catalyst for the feud appears to be a comment from the Mayor, who casually mentioned in a public forum that she\u2019d prefer \u201csomeone sensible\u201d win the election. That seemingly innocuous statement quickly spiraled into accusations that she\u2019s meddling in the sacred process of Takoma Park\u2019s local democracy. PEN members leapt into action, furiously firing off replies longer than Tolstoy novels, accusing her of everything from \u201cpetty favoritism\u201d to \u201ccorrupt political theater.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cIt\u2019s like Game of Thrones, but with more typos,\u201d said Ward 1 resident and veteran PEN listserv warrior, Harold Soapbox. \u201cSomeone posted a 3,000-word screed about the mayor\u2019s preference for oat milk as evidence of her unfitness to weigh in on this election. I think the argument had something to do with climate change and parking meters, but I couldn\u2019t follow.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

As the skirmish continued, world leaders began to take notice. Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau issued a statement saying, \u201cWe\u2019re monitoring the situation closely. The people of Takoma Park deserve our solidarity during this difficult time.\u201d Meanwhile, UN Secretary-General Ant\u00f3nio Guterres hinted at the possibility of emergency aid. \u201cWe are considering an air drop of essential supplies from the TPSS Co-op,\u201d he said. \u201cWi-Fi boosters, herbal tea, and perhaps a large batch of lavender-scented essential oils to help calm everyone down.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The PEN listserv conflict has even attracted the attention of major corporations. Twitter\u2019s rebranded platform, X, offered to sponsor a \u201cTakoma Park Throwdown\u201d live-stream event, promising exclusive behind-the-scenes access to the listserv meltdown. Toyota has even threatened to pull all advertising of the new Prius model if moderators don’t get a handle on the situation.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Despite the attention from world leaders and tech giants, Ward 1 residents seem determined to resolve the issue in-house. \u201cWe\u2019re not backing down,\u201d proclaimed local resident Shirley Fingerwaggle. \u201cWe will fight tooth and nail to preserve the sanctity of our listserv. Or at least until we burn through this month\u2019s data plan.\u201d<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

TAKOMA PARK, MD \u2014 In what some experts are calling \u201cthe most trivial yet heated political dispute of the decade,\u201d Ward 1\u2019s beloved PEN listserv has erupted into a digital battleground over a local city council election, drawing the attention of leaders around the globe. What began as a minor race of a few thousand…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":3045,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[17],"tags":[1743,1735,701,700,1734,1101,24,970,1130,140,979,122,1729,1701,537,1593,993,640,1351,638,1733,6,1745,882,98,93,111,4,228,67,145,169,171,948,433,1257,1514,1278,2,355,64,229,634,266,947,218,147,226,714,121,304,170,172,715,146,719,695,718,230,716,717,104,164],"class_list":["post-3044","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-local-news","tag-colleen-cordes","tag-community-vision-for-takoma","tag-community-vision-takoma","tag-cvt","tag-cvt-takoma","tag-dc-news","tag-dc-satire","tag-dmv-news","tag-dmv-satire","tag-fake-news","tag-google-news","tag-historic-takoma","tag-jessica-landman","tag-listserv","tag-local-news","tag-local-satire","tag-maryland-news","tag-maryland-satire","tag-moco-news","tag-moco-satire","tag-montgomery-county-satire","tag-news","tag-pen-listserv","tag-pg-county-news","tag-political-satire","tag-satire","tag-satirical-news","tag-takoma","tag-takoma-election","tag-takoma-junction","tag-takoma-junction-development","tag-takoma-library","tag-takoma-library-expansion","tag-takoma-listserv","tag-takoma-metro","tag-takoma-metro-development","tag-takoma-metro-parking","tag-takoma-news","tag-takoma-park","tag-takoma-park-arborist","tag-takoma-park-city-council","tag-takoma-park-city-election","tag-takoma-park-city-manager","tag-takoma-park-co-op","tag-takoma-park-community-center","tag-takoma-park-dog-park","tag-takoma-park-election","tag-takoma-park-elections","tag-takoma-park-facebook-group","tag-takoma-park-historic-district","tag-takoma-park-leaf-collection","tag-takoma-park-library","tag-takoma-park-library-expansion","tag-takoma-park-listserv","tag-takoma-park-mayor","tag-takoma-park-news","tag-takoma-park-police","tag-takoma-park-satire","tag-takoma-park-voting","tag-takoma-satire","tag-takoma-satirical-news","tag-takoma-torch","tag-takomatorch","wpcat-17-id"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/takomatorch.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/10\/takoma-torch-war-zone.jpg?fit=1024%2C683&ssl=1","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/paPZSG-N6","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/takomatorch.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3044","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/takomatorch.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/takomatorch.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/takomatorch.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/takomatorch.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=3044"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/takomatorch.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3044\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3047,"href":"https:\/\/takomatorch.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3044\/revisions\/3047"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/takomatorch.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/3045"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/takomatorch.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=3044"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/takomatorch.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=3044"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/takomatorch.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=3044"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}