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Marjorie Taylor Greene Demands Parkway Deli Not Use ‘Jewish Space Lasers’ To Toast Bagels

Market Manipulation Causes Takoma Park to Halt Purchasing of Co-Op Shares

Biden Calls for Unity After Takoma Park’s ‘Buy Nothing’ Community ‘Sprouts’ Into Smaller Groups

Maryland Congressman Andy Harris Suffering From Insurrectile Dysfunction

Republicans Outraged Biden Replaces ‘Nuclear Football’ with Soccer Ball

QAnon Claims Trump Presidency a Deep State Conspiracy to Get Democrats Elected

Mike Pence Asks Trump For One Final Atomic Wedgie Before Leaving Office

Maryland General Assembly Apologizes For Not Making Any National Headlines

New Vegan Doughnut Shop Helps White People of Takoma Park Find Courage to Cross Into DC Side

Capitol Police Fired, Replaced With DC Building Permit Department Employees

Trump Asks Georgia Secretary of State to Find Missing Golf Ball That Was Obviously a Hole-In-One

Dr. Fauci Advises Tricking Conspiracy Theorists Into Taking COVID-19 Vaccine By Wrapping It in Cheese

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